Hosea 6:1

Come and let us return to the Lord

For He has torn, but He will heal us;

He has stricken, but He will bind us up

We cannot do great things on this earth, only small things with great love - Mother Teresa

Wednesday, February 15, 2012


First off, let me just say that this was a very difficult blog to write. I have toiled over this for weeks now, and have tried my best to approach this matter with wisdom and grace. While I certainly do not believe in slandering other Christians, I also believe that no one ministry, or person, is above scrutiny. I also do not believe in keeping silent when leaders abuse their authority and take advantage of well-meaning individuals. Those of you who have donated to the Pink Cross, or are considering it, I ask you to please read my words with an open mind, and ask yourself if this group is worthy of your hard-earned donations. Even if a ministry has good intentions, a good missions statement, charismatic leadership, etc., if it is not faithful to the principles of God’s word, or does not operate according to Biblical standards, then it stands to reason that it is not of God.

In her ministry as a chaplain and self-appointed prophet, Shelley has made no bones about her so-called “prophetic authority.” I, personally, do not believe for one millisecond that she is a prophet, but I know that she would disagree. She has deemed herself a “rebel prophet” and a “prophet to the nations.” In one of her videos on YouTube, she claims, from the pulpit, that she “might be a prophet.” In an interview with Howard Stern, she compared herself to Martin Luther, and she even had a twitter page calling herself a “porn prophet.” By her own admission, she is a prophet, so let’s examine her ministry in light of God’s Word. Since she claims to be a prophet, I will treat her as such in this expose.

First of all, what is a prophet? By definition, a prophet of God is a morally upright person commissioned by God to proclaim the truth and lead people away from sin....someone who, by his/her conduct, inspires people to do what is right according to the will of God. Examples of prophets of old include John the Baptist, Moses, and Jeremiah.

On the contrary, a false prophet is any person who claims to be a servant or messenger of God, but is not. They will detract people from the true message of the gospel through preaching of a false gospel, or by placing the focus of their ministry on themselves rather than Christ. The ministry of Pink Cross easily falls into the second category (although there are certainly problems with the name-it-and-claim-it doctrine that Shelley espouses, but in this essay, I plan to focus on her conduct and character).

Through pride and vain-glory, false prophets elevate themselves, boasting in their good works and their superior knowledge of all things spiritual. As a result, they are themselves amoral, inclined to misleading and deceiving others and abusing the trust that people have placed in them.

While Shelley claims to be a prophet, other people claim that she is a false prophet. So, which is it?! What does the Bible say?

Mt. 7:15-19 Beware of false prophets, who come to you in sheep’s clothing, but inwardly they are ravenous wolves. You will know them by their fruits...Every good tree bears good fruit, but a bad tree bears bad fruit...Therefore by their fruits you shall know them.

Fruits, in the Scripture and Jewish phraseology, are taken for works of any kind. “A man’s works,” says one, “are the tongue of his heart, and tell honestly whether he is inwardly corrupt or pure.” By these works you may distinguish these ravenous wolves from true ministers. (A. Clarke commentary)

Most people define a false prophet as one who proclaims a false or blasphemous gospel that runs contrary to the word of God. While this in itself is true, we must also consider the character of a false prophet. Jesus Christ SAID that a false prophet can be distinguished by his/her behaviour. A prophet is not one who simply stands on a stage, preaches, and proclaims authority. Anyone can do that. Personal charisma is not a sign of prophetic authority – but personal conduct IS. If his/her behaviour doesn’t jibe with Scripture, then that person is a charlatan.

In my time working for Pink Cross, I noticed that Shelley’s personal conduct, sadly, wasn’t conducive to how a minister should conduct herself. It is not so much Shelley’s doctrine that I have a problem with, but rather her personal character and the focus of her ministry, which seems to be primarily self-centered rather than Christ-centered.


The book of 2 Peter gives the most extensive description of false prophets; therefore, I will use this passage to examine Shelley’s claims.

1 Peter 2:1 tells us that there arose false prophets among the people. This implies that these were self-appointed prophets; in other words, they were not appointed by any council of leaders, nor did they have any real authority behind them, other than their own word. The Lord did NOT appoint them, but they appointed themselves.

Hebrews 1:1 God, who at various times and in various ways spoke in times past to the fathers by the prophets, has in these last days spoken to us by His Son.......

What this passage tells us is that God NO LONGER appoints prophets, like He did in the Old Testament, to proclaim His word. There are modern-day prophets, but they are appointed THROUGH THE CHURCH.

“The chief ministry of the O.T. prophet was a hortatory one to his own generation. That is, he was a preacher who rebuked Israel because of its sins, and pointed the way of righteousness....In the case of the N.T. prophet in the church, the preaching of the gospel of grace to the unsaved and the exposition of the Word to the saints constitute his responsibilities.” (Wuest’s Word Studies)

If Shelley IS a modern-day prophet, she would be prophesying under the authority of the church, but by her own proclamation, Shelley does not need to BE under the authority of a church, because her and Pink Cross ARE the true church. Ironically, that is what cults typically proclaim, as well….that THEY are the true church. She is basically a self-appointed prophet, as the passage in 2 Peter warns us. Because she is not under the authority of a church, she is not accountable to anyone – just herself and what she believes God is telling her.

Shelley Lubben is NOT a prophet, because she is not prophesying in the manner which God sets forth in His word. She calls herself the “rebel prophet” – well, at least she got one part of it right.


I have always been very uncomfortable with how Pink Cross focuses its mission endeavours, which seem geared more towards promoting Shelley’s work in the lives of porn stars, than the work of Christ. Shelley boasts that she has helped “hundreds of women” escape from a life of porn, and provides testimonies on her site which glorify the heroic deeds of Shelley. The Bible teaches that we are to do our good deeds before men, that God in heaven may be glorified – yet in many of these testimonials, it seems Shelley is the one who is being glorified. Many of these girls describe how awful their lives were until they found the Pink Cross website, and Shelley reached out, encouraged, and loved them.

Shelley’s facebook page is filled with comments such as “You are my hero” or “I am in awe of you.” I find it sad that whenever Shelley posts one of her updates on the Pink Cross facebook page, for example a link to someone’s testimony, or an update on condom legislation, she gets numerous posts praising her and telling her how wonderful she is. Even if she does not encourage this kind of behaviour, she certainly does not discourage it, either. On the contrary, I would argue that she DOES encourage it, by telling people to post “ONLY positive, encouraging comments.” No negative feedback is allowed. I have personally seen how comments are censored and negative feedback is erased, both on her social networking pages and on her website (back when the chat forums actually had a section to post comments to Shelley). Point blank, Shelley will NOT address criticism. Like most other cults, she will do her best to silence her dissenters.

Christians, I ask you – is this how Christ encouraged us to minister?! Did He instruct us to silence those who might challenge us, or to engage them? Did Christ tell people to only come to Him with “positive, encouraging comments?” No!! When people would challenge Him, He would engage them, countering their arguments with truth. THIS is why the Scriptures say that He “spoke as one having authority.” Beware of ANY LEADER who refuses to be challenged, or engaged, but will only acknowledge positive feedback.


Take heed that you do not do your charitable deeds before men, to be seen by them (Mt. 6:1)

The Lord will not share His glory with any man, but that is exactly what is going on in the testimonies on the Pink Cross website. Without fail, somewhere in every testimony, Shelley is lauded in her heroic philanthropic efforts. Jesus is mentioned too...but not always.

How honest are most of these testimonies?! While I cannot speak for everyone, in my own case, Shelley did revise my testimony, and at least one other girl has admitted to having her story embellished by Shelley:

This raises the question: How many other testimonies might have been embellished, or tampered with?

Shelley knows just what elements make for good drama. When I was working for Pink Cross, Shelley would always ask me if I got any STDs in the porn industry. I would always tell her no, but she continued asking. One particular incident, I remember, was when we were set to speak at UCLA. Again, she asked me if I had contracted any STDs during my time in porn. When I told her no, she asked if I was sure. When I told her yes, she asked if I had been tested after my exit from porn. At the time, I suspected that she was trying to coax something out of me, or pushing for me to come up with some fictitious STD. I actually felt bad that I did not have any more juicy STD stories than the occasional yeast infection.

It wasn’t just speaking engagements and written testimonies, though. For the upcoming Killer Fantasy movie, Shelley wanted to conduct a candid interview with me about my time in the industry....basically, share my testimony. What should have taken about 30 minutes took a few hours to film. Shelley made sure that my “performance” was on par with the dramatic element of the documentary. She would constantly start and stop the camera, make me say things 3 or 4 times to “get it right,” and tell me how I needed to express myself. She completely led the interview. Many times, she would stop the camera and say “I like that, that’s good, but you need to say it THIS way.” She made a comment about how I had trouble crying and expressing emotion. The entire interview was totally directed by Shelley. That is because it was all for show.

I have participated in filmed interviews before, but unlike this experience, I was encouraged to speak freely, and be myself. I just thought the whole thing was very contrived and dishonest.


I worked closely with Shelley for 8 months. During this time, I witnessed a lot of conduct which I strongly feel did not coincide with how a minister of the gospel should conduct herself. Again, we can look to 2 Peter, as he sets forth the classic profile of a false prophet. I will focus on 3 in particular.


Scripture describes false prophets as covetous and greedy, motivated largely by monetary or personal gain. Ministries that constantly try to press people for money, rather than trusting God to supply its needs, typically fall into this category.

2 Peter 2:3 By covetousness they will exploit (literally “make merchandise”) you with deceptive words.....

The Pink Cross Money Machine

While finances are certainly a concern for any Christian ministry, for Shelley and Pink Cross, it was an obsession. Shelley would talk a lot about securing that one big donor, and that she was praying that someone would donate a million dollars to Pink Cross. Money was a HUGE concern with Pink Cross – and overly so.

Every time a girl would come out with her story on the Pink Cross site, it would turn into a plea for money. As Shelley’s executive assistant, I was in charge of writing her newsletter. Shelley would propose the articles that were to be included, and would always remind me to make sure to ask for money. She would tell me which Scriptures to use, such as Matthew 25:40

Whatever you have done to the least of these, you have done unto me

to tug on people’s heartstrings to give (If you will notice, this isn’t even used in the right context). Whenever donations went down, or were not at the level that Shelley deemed they should be, she would put the pressure on us to raise funds quickly. We were to do this by constantly promoting her book and CD on social networking sites like facebook, and contacting as many donors as we could. She said that our main goal in life should be to promote her CD and book, to raise funds for Pink Cross. Moreover, she would constantly boast about her own fund-raising skills, saying that she was able to raise a lot of money quickly, so we should be able to, as well. As an employee, this put enormous pressure on me, and I found myself losing sight of the real focus of my ministry, which was to help people.

Matthew 6:33 says “Seek ye first the Kingdom of God, and His righteousness, and all of these things shall be added unto you.

Working for Shelley, I found myself seeking money first. This was not right.

Shelley would constantly tell me how she was not making any money off of the CD or book, and how she was actually losing money, because she was giving so many copies away. It wasn’t until I left Pink Cross that I actually found out how much Shelley Lubben Communications was bringing in.

Shelley would always say that Pink Cross would have to shut its doors if more people didn’t step up to the plate and give generously. This I never understood, as Shelley ran Pink Cross from her home, and the level of expenses didn’t really seem to match the level of need that we claimed. In addition to the monthly donations, and the money from her online book and CD sales, during my employment with Pink Cross, I accompanied Shelley to different speaking engagements, mostly at churches. Not only did she receive a speaking fee for these engagements, but she also collected donations, and sold books and CDs. These were pretty good-sized crowds, and while I don’t know exactly how much she collected, it had to be substantial, as I manned the table, and saw how many people were donating. Even so, Pink Cross always seemed to be in “great need” (I often wondered where the money was going, since we seemed in such desperate need all the time and, and not a lot of outreach was going on), and we were constantly asked to step up the fundraising efforts....especially when the conventions rolled around. It was at this time that we received a generous influx of supplies and monetary donations, including make-up, books, etc. On the surface, it seemed we were receiving more than enough to meet our needs, but not according to Shelley, which was strange, because she claimed that the sales of the books and CDs were going to support Pink Cross. We should have had more than enough.

Even before I started working for Shelley, I had concerns about how they were handling money. I saw the videos on YouTube, exposing the discrepancies in their tax forms.

Shelley did address this before I came to work for them, and said just to ignore them, as they were done by mean-spirited people who only wanted to bring down the work of God. Even so, there was really no denying the validity of these videos. It wasn’t until I started working directly on their fundraising projects that real concerns began to arise regarding the integrity of their financial dealings. When I did their profile for Guidestar, which is a network of non-profit organizations, I noticed that the tax forms that they submitted to the IRS in 2009 were different than those which were on the Pink Cross website. It was like 2 completely different forms, with a different set of numbers. I don’t know – perhaps it was a discrepancy (more like several) on their part, or bad bookkeeping, but it just seemed fishy to me. When I approached Garrett about this, he told me to take the tax form off of Guidestar, but by this time, I was unable to do this. The form they posted was directly from the IRS. What made it even more irritating was that Shelley would constantly brag about the whole thing, saying “I don’t see the IRS knocking on my door.” I took it as her boasting that she had gotten away with something.

I was never directly involved in the financial aspects of Pink Cross, but I can say that it just didn’t seem to add up.

The Bible says that false prophets will use deception to exploit people and make merchandise off of them. Shelley would publicly proclaim how no other organization did more than the Pink Cross to fight porn, and rescue women from the porn industry. In my 8 months with Pink Cross, I do not recall “rescuing” one girl from porn. Other than helping one or maybe two girls with some utility bills, sending out cards and care packages every once in a while, not much outreach was going on, aside from the 1 porn convention that I helped to organize. I do remember that during that time, Shelley sent some flowers and a care package to porn star Kacey Jordan, while she was in the hospital....of course, as soon as she received them, Pink Cross made sure to post it all over the internet, along with a picture and a message from Kacey, thanking Pink Cross. Pink Cross was never able to quietly help a woman in need. It was always about exploiting every single outreach endeavor, and publicizing everything – my guess is in order to generate donations.

Meanwhile, as the Pink Cross outreach contact, I was told that in NO WAY did we help with rent or phone expenses, even if the girl desperately needed it. The only thing we could really help with was food and utilities. Catholic Charities and other philanthropic organizations help people pay rent all the time. Why couldn’t we?! I remember in particular, one girl I counseled was 3 months behind on her rent, with 2 young children. The most we could do for her was pay her electric bill and send her some food cards. She came to me several times expressing her fear that she would get evicted, but my hands were tied. The most I could do was refer her to churches and social services. I simply didn’t understand why we couldn’t help out more, especially since we seemed to have plenty of funds.


Jude 16 These men (false prophets)....boast about themselves and flatter others for their own advantage

2 Peter 2:18 For they mouth empty, boastful words and, by appealing to the lustful desires of the sinful human nature.....

True prophets of God are humble and meek. Moses, one of the greatest prophets in the Bible, was described by God as more humble than anyone on the face of the earth (Num. 12:3). It would make sense, then, that false prophets are just the opposite – full of themselves, vainly puffed up by (their) fleshly mind (Col. 2:18), often glorifying themselves to gain advantage.

Peter describes them as “presumptuous and self-willed” -- arrogant and self-pleasing. Other passages indicate that they are prideful, and boastful in their self-proclaimed authority. I witnessed this kind of behaviour a LOT when I was working for Pink Cross....excessively, as a matter of fact, and towards the end especially, I found it extremely troubling.

I have seen Shelley boast in her authority as a self-proclaimed “high prophetess of God.” For many of you who have followed Shelley and Pink Cross, I’m sure this comes as no surprise. She has referred to herself as a prophet in her message to the Crossing Church (on YouTube), and has released a video where she prays with an 8-foot staff (a rod or staff in the Old Testament is a symbol of prophetic authority). I have also heard her make some outrageous claims; for example, that she knew more Bible than anyone, and even comparing herself to the apostle Paul in terms of greatness. She basically implied that she was greater than him because “he didn’t have to deal with pornographers.”

Because she was a prophet of God, no one was allowed to question or correct her. She would complain about people who “really didn’t understand the high calling” trying to give her advice or input. She would get offended when churches would ask her to tone down her testimony, saying that they were only hindering the work of the Holy Spirit. Because she was the one with the high calling, no one else really had anything worthwhile to offer in terms of wisdom or guidance, and she would complain when people would offer their two cents.

Spiritual Confusion

One of the things I remember most about working with Pink Cross, was the constant obsession with supposed “spiritual warfare”, and the Satanic attacks that we constantly seemed to be under. There were a lot of inherent problems with the organization, and naturally there was a lot of criticism. Like everyone else on the team, I would attribute any sort of disapproval to “Satanic opposition.” This was the mindset of Pink Cross – do not engage or listen to anyone who comes against us, for they are merely tools of Satan, who hates us and wants to bring down the ministry of Pink Cross. We were constantly in “heavy spiritual warfare,” and demons were constantly harassing or attacking us. As a team, we were to try and shield Shelley from any sort of opposition that might try and distract her from her calling. Any sort of disapproval against Shelley or Pink Cross was automatically attributed to the devil, and whoever criticized us was basically a tool of Satan – especially those in the porn industry, when Shelley would come under fire. We were told not to listen to any of it, as it was all a direct result of Satanic attacks on Pink Cross – none of it had any credence -- after all, we were always in “heavy spiritual warfare.” Looking back, I realize that it most of this was not spiritual warfare, but spiritual confusion.

Shelley made some absolutely bizarre claims – claims that appeared highly irrational. Shelley would always say that God directly told her these things, but I knew in my heart that NONE OF IT was from God.

For one thing, she claimed that God gave her the authority to bless and curse people. This is a classic case of spiritual manipulation. Many false prophets will try to silence their objectors with fear by taking verses from the Old Testament out-of-context, which is exactly what Shelley tried to do with me on several occasions. She would sometimes re-iterate 1 Chronicles 16:22: “Do not touch my anointed ones, and do my prophets no harm.” I remember one e-mail in particular that she wrote to the entire Pink Cross team, telling us that God told her that He would come against ANYONE who stood in the way of her ministry. By the tone of the letter, and the way it was worded, I took it to mean us as a team. I’m sorry, but the Bible does not give ANYONE the authority to curse people....and the whole “do not touch my anointed” reference wouldn’t even apply.

She would talk about being taken up into the heavenly places and battling thousands of demons, and doing battle with the spirit of Jezebel. She talked about being the prophet Elijah spoken of in the book of Revelation, citing her house on Elias (Elijah) Avenue as evidence of this.

Oftentimes, we would commute to Los Angeles, to attend conventions or CalOSHA meetings. We would often drive past the Vivid offices. Shelley would always extend her hand and call for utter destruction of the porn industry, calling on God to rain down “fire and brimstone from heaven.” I found this bizarre, since Jesus rebuked His apostles for trying to do the exact same thing, saying “You do not know what manner of spirit you are of.” (Luke 9:55)

These are just a few of the bizarre claims that I heard her speak. I suppose it is easy for anyone to be manipulated. In my case, I took my eyes off of the Lord, and tried to justify all of the contradictions that were so glaringly obvious. Like everyone else on the team, I elevated to Shelley in my mind to the level of super-saint, and neglected the innate problems and disturbing behaviour that I witnessed every single day. There was so much that contradicted sound doctrine, but I didn’t want to confront it.


Last but not least, the Bible (Jude 19) tells us that these false prophets will separate themselves from the church, and conduct themselves in ways that are sensual, or fleshly.

2 Peter 2:2 And many will follow their destructive ways, because of whom the way of truth will be blasphemed

Because of the conduct of these false teachers, “Christianity is spoken against by the world” (Wuest). Sadly, I have noticed much of Shelley’s behaviour has brought disgrace on the very gospel she is trying to proclaim, especially within the porn community – the very people that she is trying to reach. Shelley’s antics have become fodder for Christian-bashing on porn websites. A minister of the gospel is supposed to be above reproach, but sadly, much scandal has rocked the Pink Cross. The Pink Cross defends itself against these accusations by either ignoring them, or saying that they are perpetrated by “evil pornographers trying to bring down the ministry.”

The following video represents Shelley’s idea of “outreach evangelism.”

This is not outreach, but rather lewd and carnal behaviour.

Shelley has been accused of abusing prescription drugs and alcohol, by more than one person. I can personally attest that these accusations are true. I have also smelled alcohol on her breath, and I, along with other Pink Cross members, have drank at her house.

Her own brother has come forth and called her a liar, as seen on this YouTube video:

Even if she was not lying (which I personally believe that she was, or at least embellishing), the vicious attacks that she puts forth against her parents in her book blatantly go against the fifth commandment – Honor thy Father and thy mother. Notice this commandment doesn’t have any stipulations attached, such as “unless you have been hurt by them, or they kicked you out of the house,” yet Shelley has bashed her parents in almost every interview and talk she has given, in flagrant disobedience to the only “commandment with promise.”


If I had to describe what it was like being involved with Pink Cross, I would have to liken it more to a cult than a ministry…at least, that is the way I felt. I have read personal accounts from people who have been involved in religious cults. Like them, I felt manipulated, persuaded into blind, unwavering devotion, and consumed with pleasing Shelley.

On several occasions, Shelley would talk about her own experience in church ministry, serving under the leadership of pastors. She said that under no circumstances did she ever challenge the leader, but would always submit herself under his authority, even if she knew he was wrong. According to Shelley, this was the model that I, as a servant of God, was to follow. I was not to question or call out the leadership that the Lord had placed me under, even if I KNEW that what the leader espoused was wrong, for to do so would constitute going against the Lord Himself. She never specified her own name, but I knew what she was getting at.

This was the pattern that we, as Pink Cross ministers, were to follow – unquestioned loyalty. Although I never completely abandoned my sense of spiritual discernment, there were many times I held my tongue and went along with Shelley’s leadership and decision-making, even when I knew that there were problems. I understood that Shelley would not take criticism.

People in cults report feeling controlled or intimidated by their leader. This is exactly how I felt during my time with Pink Cross, especially when it came to my interaction with other people. Because “evil pornographers” were trying to destroy the ministry, we were urged not to talk to anyone outside the Pink Cross circle about Pink Cross-related issues or concerns. If we needed prayer, or were discouraged and needed encouragement, we were to seek out our fellow Pink Crossers. Moreover, Shelley told us who we could talk to, and who we were to stay away from. There were certain individuals who under no circumstances were we to talk to.

Radical cults are known for doing this same kind of thing. Members are not allowed to talk to people outside of the organization. I also find it ironic that Shelley takes legal action against people who challenge her using her You Tube videos, filing DCMAs and citing them for copyright infringement. This is the same technique used by the Church of Scientology to silence their critics.

Much of the time, I felt intimidated by Shelley. I was afraid to approach her with anything that I thought she might see as interfering with the work of the ministry. This fear started on the day that Shelley yelled and cursed at me for suggesting that another team member (who shall remain nameless) stay behind from working at one of Shelley’s speaking engagements because she was extremely ill. With every reprimand I received from her, I grew more and more intimidated.

Most of the time, I knew I could not approach her with any of my needs, as she directly told us, on several occasions, that bothering her with our problems was unacceptable. She was too busy battling pornographers and demons to worry about our problems. For us to bother her with our problems would be to distract her from her “high calling.” She told us directly in an e-mail that our job was to “hold her up.”

Did Christ ever tell His disciples that their job was to “hold Him up?” Christ said that He came, not to be served, but to serve. Ironically, Shelley once said that the Lord told her that her and Garrett had spent so many years serving, that it was time for them to be served.

When I came to her with my financial concerns, she would respond by telling me that I didn’t have enough faith. In one particularly scathing e-mail, Shelley told the Pink Cross team that their financial worries were from the “pit of hell,” and that we had better not bother Shelley or her family with our petty concerns. Her and her family were under no obligation to help us, because God was more than capable of carrying us through.

She reminded us how God had blessed her and Garrett, and cited their great faith as reason for this. At the time, I believed her, because she was well-respected and seemed to have a high calling. Who was I to question her? I was not thinking rationally.

Looking back, I see how I was being manipulated, intentionally or not, by Shelley. I felt beat down and faithless, and admired, even envied, Shelley’s “incredible walk of faith.” By reprimanding me for my lack of faith, Shelley was more or less putting the blame for our financial situation on us, while beating us down for our “lack of faith and trust in God.”
Her and Garrett were wealthy because they trusted God, and if we would just have faith, all of our needs would be met, and we wouldn’t have to complain. God had opened the door for us to be involved in a “powerful worldwide ministry,” and we were accept our calling without whining or bellyaching.

We were to pray and seek God, and trust Him for our needs, rather than bothering her and her family. Shelley was always too weary from spiritual battle to be bothered with our basic needs....all the while claiming how much she “loved us.”

Working with her was very confusing. One day, we were mighty warriors for God with special gifts and a high calling. The next day, we were weak, undependable, and not grounded enough in the word. Moreover, she would continually tell us that we needed more of the word, and more Holy Spirit, like her. I always felt inadequate. It was very difficult to know where I stood with her.

All of this, along with her proclamation that Pink Cross Foundation is “the true church,” her declaration of “prophetic authority,” boasting, and outlandish claims, all add up to a profile of cult-like mentality.


What I have presented here is just the tip of the iceberg. There are other issues with Lubben and Pink Cross, but what I have laid out should be more than sufficient in proving my point. Shelley claims to be a prophet of the Most High, yet her personal conduct runs counter to the message she proclaims. I implore every one of you reading this – examine the evidence I have presented, in light of God’s Word, and judge for yourselves.

If you need further evidence, I can post more, but I do not wish to drag this on much longer. If you are supporting Pink Cross, I ask that you prayerfully consider what I have laid out here. God expects us to be good stewards of the money He has given us, and just like those servants in the parable of the talents (Mt. 25), we will be held accountable for how we invest our money. Do you really want to contribute to a person who causes the gospel to be blasphemed, who has let down and hurt the very women that she claims to help, and misappropriates the funds that she claims are being used to help porn stars


  1. Ms. Garris, your testimony was very informative. I contributed once to PC a couple years ago, but that will never happen again. I had Lubben as a FB "friend" as well, but I recently "unfriended" her. Even though I didn't participate on her FB page, I got the impression that she was enjoying all the attention there way too much and was very narcissistic. If I ever had any doubts about whether Lubben and PC are authentic, they're now gone with the wind! Everything you wrote is completely in line with the behavior of false prophets/cults and with the testimonies I've read from others who have had any contact with PC.

    What you've experienced also falls under the category of "spiritual abuse." Ronald Enroth, an expert on spiritual abuse, writes: "All that is needed for abuse is a pastor accountable to no one and therefore beyond confrontation." You might want to check out some articles on the Web about spiritual abuse, because there are many helpful ones.

    "She talked about being the prophet Elijah spoken of in the book of Revelation, citing her house on Elias (Elijah) Avenue as evidence of this."

    That is unreal (as well as what she said about the apostle Paul). It's obvious that Shelley has a messiah complex and needs serious help. For all that she seems to rant and rave about demons, from what I see, I would guess that her "ministry" is filled with demons who are there because of her own terrible sin. (I feel sorry for her kids.) Where the demonic reigns, spiritual confusion follows. Rather than attacking her, it seems to me that demonic spirits are right at home with Shelley and her "ministry." One helpful thing to pray would be that any demonic power within Shelley and her "ministry" fully manifest for all to see, so that no one will continue to be deceived or fooled by her.

    Thank you for your insightful testimony. I'm sorry you had to live through all that. As for Lubben and her fraud, hopefully the game will be up soon.

  2. Oh, one more thing. I find it highly ironic that Shelley refers to porn stars as mentally ill. Her statement may be true, but it seems to me that she's twice as ill as most of them are.

  3. I couldn't agree with you more panettonea ! I have been a long time friend of April's myself serve with her in PC as well. And April,shares this post out of love. And this was taken in prayer,& a lot of seeking the Lord before this post. And I talked with April over the phone after this was posted. And I shared with her no matter,how hard people might take this,or take away from this blog. To those who are gung ho for Shelley Lubben or Pink Cross. Are very hurt of the reality of what takes place in this group.

    Even after the 1st post in pt.1 a few people were conflicted about what the leader has already done. Its hard to register in our minds when we all support someone or some group for so long.

    In the Words of the patron saint of Outlaw Preachers -Johnny Cash :

    Well you may throw your rock and hide your hand
    Workin' in the dark against your fellow man
    But as sure as God made black and white
    What's done in the dark will be brought to the light

    You can run on for a long time
    Run on for a long time
    Run on for a long time
    Sooner or later God'll cut you down
    Sooner or later God'll cut you down

    Go tell that long tongue liar
    Go and tell that midnight rider
    Tell the rambler, the gambler, the back biter
    Tell 'em that God's gonna cut you down
    Tell 'em that God's gonna cut you down
    Tell 'em that God's gonna cut you down

    This is my honest opinion, & I share this, because I care for people,& I take very serious when someone is harmed. Especially by a leader or group who is enabling & doing the harming.

    When I got the call from a woman who left the compound with her daughter,back in Sept. it broke my heart to hear from the words of a person whom was being enabled with prescription drugs & alcohol, from the leader who was doing the samething. I hope that people who are there will not be afraid to speak up,some of those people, out of fear are sticking with her. And that those who support her will,open thier eyes & see for themselves what is going on & see through the mask of whats really happening.

    All of what I read is what happened with David Koresh, & people of the like.

    Well that all I gotta say about it. people could agree with this reply or not.

    Thanks for your time


  4. Johnny, you made some very good points. The problem with Lubben is that the stated intentions of her foundation are very good, but 1) she doesn't practice what she preaches and 2) everything is done in exploitation. For instance, I see that she recently denounced Planned Parenthood as well (which is a good thing). The problem is, there are such horrible mixtures of good and evil in her ministry. Does she really care about the things she advocates, beyond how they can gain her fame and wealth? She also does a terrible disservice to the very things she stands for. The porn industry sounds horrible, but since Lubben is such a deceitful spokesperson, how does anyone know how much of what she says about the porn industry is really true?

    What I don't quite understand is why people stick with her when she treats them like garbage. I guess they're dazzled by her "fame" or whatever. Ultimately, only God can expose her, and letting her funds dry up should certainly help. LOL.

  5. Your preaching to the chior panettonea.... I already know the score is.. I've gone on video & expressed what April has shared & what you shared. So I already know whats going on.. lol

    Ive seen it 1st hand like April.

  6. OK, LOL. Do you have any videos posted about your own experience?

  7. This is huge. I wonder if the IRS has gotten involved yet... Don't they investigate things like this when there's probable cause?

    1. After reading the blog I thought that the director of the organization is a young in the Lord person who needs discipleship. She obviously has a message though that we should not stop. But if you're concerned about her finances you can always call the IRS. Has the person who wrote The Blog confronted the director?

  8. OK, thanks, Johnny. As far as the IRS goes, they should get involved, Mike. I wonder if there's any way for us to help that process along? ;)

  9. Your welcome panettonea ! I do believe that their will be an investigation,of how this groups handles their money. And how Lubben is trying to recruit others to move to Bakersfield to join this Cult "I mean" group...People who have donated in the past (a number of people)No longer support this group, after what she has done already. With a female in her care,while the woman had her daughter with her.

    People felt like they were RIPPED-OFF ! I have heard that there was legal action gonna start.

    She has lost all her credibility,any church appearance or tv appearance,or radio is all for show,& a gimmick. Their funds are low now, the Testimonies especially the new ones. Are Re-written just for effect,for heart jerking from people who read it,& its already a known fact that alot of Shelley's story is embellished & made more extravagant then from the original. And she has used other peoples experiences as her own.

    And coerced others to make their stories sound extreme than what it is really. I have spent time with April recently in her town for church & a time of fellowship. And we talked about the issues of all this.

    Anything from Shelley Lubben & the Group, is just a way to milk money from honest working people. So she could keep up with her extravagant lifestyle. And the rent for Mel's Apartment. And the list goes on & on. I have already gave the info of Shelley Lubben & her group. Right after she had a porn debate with a Ron Jeremy on FOX LA News here in Los Angeles. I refered info to Newscaster Jeff Michaels of Ron & Shelley's previous meeting, with her getting her boobs signed in the video above.

    It saddens me to know there are people like this...

  10. "Their funds are low now..."

    Well, since Shelley has so much more faith than anyone else, I'm sure she'll do whatever it takes to believe for a million dollars. LOL.

  11. Well,panettonea,I'm amazed that she is still doing speaking at churches, Cal-Osha & AHF don't want nothing to do with her anymore. Because she tried to lobby & make a circus sideshow. Out of these people, & so now AHF has distanced themselves from her. because they found out she is crazy (IMO)...

    She throws her own family under the bus. Her own brother whom I have come in contact with, says her story & how she portrays the her family is further from the truth. And what she shares is half truth, & lies...

  12. "She throws her own family under the bus. Her own brother whom I have come in contact with, says her story & how she portrays the her family is further from the truth."

    I would guess that she bosses her husband around too. If so, I wonder how he feels about it?

  13. Thank you for posting this. Very interesting, and has kind of confirmed what I had felt for a while, but I thought I was just being a jerk!

    I supported Pink Cross from the moment I heard about it, (if I didn’t have such an amazing mother I would have probably ended up in a similar situation), I donated a total of maybe $100 from 2006 or 2007 to 2010, not a huge amount, but it was a lot for me to find, any prayer requests, I prayed, and I told many people about P.C. I continued doing so even after I felt things weren’t quite right (for example on one post on her personal page, I called someone on a very offensive comment about a whole group of people, he went on to repeatedly verbally abuse me (including very unpleasant words to call any woman), my responding calmly seemed to anger his hysteria even more. A few days later, I checked if the person said anything more to me, and found all of my side of the argument had been deleted, but most of theirs hadn’t, my conclusion was that Shelley must agree with what the other person had said). I told myself that even though I may not like how some things were done, Pink Cross does good work and so the charity (if not the founder) was worth supporting.

    Then last year Shelley started facebooking/tweeting some things that ranged from what I felt childish to downright offensive to entire groups of people when taken at face value, I thought there’d be further explanation of it in another post, but none was ever made, so I figured that she must actually feel that way, in spite of constantly saying she loves EVERYONE. Also I saw on facebook another Pink Cross worker/volunteer was clearly crying out for help, and all the help she seemed to get was comments like “we love you beautiful girl”. (I don’t know her situation, so I shan’t say any more, but I guess you know who she is) and I started to think WHO is the money going to if not to those who need help??

    The tweet that made me decide to stop supporting was posted on December 10th
    “I find it interesting that those who attack me are not married, don't have children, don't help anyone and don't have a job.”
    Through no fault of my own, I am all of these things! Because of a painful female condition, I’m unlikely to ever have children, I’m unable to work and some days can’t do anything for myself, let alone anyone else! Caring about people is useless without physically doing (and I wouldn’t want to marry any of the men I’ve met!). I know it wasn’t a direct swipe at me (probably far from it), but I was having a bad day, feeling down and useless, and that tweet HURT. (stops “playing violin” ;-b)

    And then the hardcore/rape videos started. I remember when I first found Pink Cross, Shelley was always saying how preserving modesty of the actors is most important, I liked that, but the rape videos made me REALLY UNCOMFORTABLE. I couldn’t believe what turn she had taken! I hate to say it, but it felt like a sordid graphic attempt to get money.

    I believe Pink Cross was started with genuine aim to help, but somewhere along the line something else seems to have become priority. It makes me sad to “publically announce” that I’m not supporting a charity any more, I thought I was just being mean or selfish or childish, but yeah, these blogs have helped me get rid of this burden of guilt and allayed my concerns about feeling that I don’t want to support them any more. You have answered my niggles and the things that didn’t sit quite right.

    Thank you


    Wow, went on a bit there, sorry!

  14. someone left a message on my twitter feed asking me to look at this post, and i did. i have a few things to say after reading it, hoping it would shed light on anything significantly wrong with Shelly Lubben's efforts.

    It didn't.

    i will take a more liberal viewpoint to counter this argument against Shelly. Why? because that's the remedy, in this case.

    i've seen nothing considerable in these complaints against her.

    what i do see is a lot of Pauline idealism that doesn't work so well in the real world.

    for instance, Shelly isn't accountable to "the church." what church? there are thousands of Protestant denominations. not one of them is under the supposed "true church" yet probably most of them claim to be the true one or best one.

    No, Shelly is absolutely needed, going out there and doing what she's doing.

    Doubtlessly, she's indispensable. To God.

    i disagree that she ought to be a better example of so-called purity with strict sobriety and displays of nun-like chastity.

    that wouldn't reach the girls who need help, and it wouldn't convince the donors that she's an effective outreach.

    and one more thing. there's the criticism here that Shelly isn't selfless. Paul said one should prefer the other.

    Jesus said one should love one's neighbor as oneself.

    wait a minute, if Shelly is doing what Jesus said rather than fitting into a modern religious concept of what comes out of Paul's mold, it's time to examine the criticism.

    Shelly does prefer those girls to herself by loving them like she loves herself. She hasn't chosen one (against the other) while leaving the other undone.


    1. This comment has been removed by the author.

    2. "Doubtlessly, she's indispensable. To God."

      Jason, this statement just offends me and every Bible-believing Christian on earth. To say that a servant is "indispensable" means the master cannot be without. Do you even know who God is? Do you even think He can't destroy porn without Shelly? Read the book of Job, or Isaiah 40, or Esther 4:12-14

      "When Esther’s words were reported to Mordecai, he sent back this answer: “Do not think that because you are in the king’s house you alone of all the Jews will escape. For if you remain silent at this time, relief and deliverance for the Jews will arise from another place, but you and your father’s family will perish. And who knows but that you have come to royal position for such a time as this?”

      We rely on God, not the other way around, and if we tarnish His righteous name, he will cease to use us and bless us with His Spirit.


    3. If God sent someone to minister to the people to whom Shelley ministers, whom would He consult? On whose wisdom would He rely?

  15. Jason..."All Scripture is given by inspiration of God and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness" (2 Tim. 3:16). The "outmoded" Pauline model of ministry that the Scripture espouses was inspired by the Holy Spirit, and is as effective now as it was when the epistles were written. It's not about "displays of nun-like chastity," but more about holding oneself up to a standard of holiness and Godly character.

    Do you really believe that dancing like a stripper and having Ron Jeremy sign her chest is endearing her to those in the industry? No, because I can tell you right now, as an ex-performer myself, those people are looking for something different....something to believe in.

    I have given you much Scriptural evidence to back up my claims against Shelley, and her ministry methods. With all due respect, if the Word of God will not convince you, then I'm not sure what will.

    I worked closely with Shelley for 3 years. I attended conventions with her, traveled with her, and even oversaw her ministry outreach for a little while, and I can tell you right now that you are wrong when you say that she loves these women like she loves herself. Her financials speak otherwise. Love isn't hearing a woman's plea for help, telling her she's "precious, then turning the other way. Love is reaching out and doing everything in your power to help her and make her know that she truly IS loved!!!

    I can tell you that several women have come public about their experience with Shelley. She has been called everything from a "user" to a "monster." These are the women that you claim Shelley loved like she loves herself.

    I can also tell you that Shelley's outrageous behaviour and antics have brought ridicule upon her and the Pink Cross from many of those in the industry. I have heard people mock her. It brings disgrace upon, and blasphemes, the gospel of Christ. People just don't know that because it is not published in any of her newsletters.

    I really hope that you will really take into consideration what I had to say in this blog.

    Thank you

    1. if u have done one scene does that count?so many perrformers have done xxx and never was on imdb!shelley claims she is that good when off camera all she talks about is money!keep the pink cross going send money!i never heard her talk about those performers who never made it big in the porn business!real productions wants me to do porn in ct but i said no!all i ever see when i watch the religious channels is that we need money! i am sick of it!i hope god really blesses you 4ever!james 4:7 submit yourself to god therefore resist the devil and he will flee from you!

  16. April, this hurts to read, I've often prayed for this ministry. I never thought something like this was going on.

  17. Thank you for responding, Lloyd. I certainly did not want to hurt you with this post, and for that I am truly sorry, but I also felt a moral obligation to say what I did. A lot of people were taken in and deceived by what they thought was a work of God. I just hope that this post brings awareness and opens peoples' eyes.

    I also want to encourage you by saying that God IS working on the hearts of those in the industry. Please, continue to pray for those in porn -- not just that they would leave porn, but for salvation and repentance. God loves every single one of them.

    Also know that God will remove any false prophet who blasphemes the gospel, or stands in the way of the work He wants to do. Pray that God will raise up people who have a heart for those in porn.

  18. Wow! Thank you for this information. I felt compelled to donate to the Pink Cross after receiving an email about one of the young ladies being assaulted by a relative. I was on a deployment in the Middle East at the time and was unable to access the Pink Cross website due to base internet restrictions. You have a lot of courage and I commend you for what you are doing. Thank you again. God bless you!

  19. I am married 17 years, pregnant with our sixth child, help wherever I can (even offered to help with PC, though it was not financial, and it wad completely ignored), and do indeed work! . . . And have been skeptically and concerned for some time. This is confirmation of what I have sensed in my soul.
    signed, wife to a man with the gift of prophecy who HATES for anyone to know his gift, downplays it constantly, and when he is used, does so quietly and with discretion, wanting only God to be heard and not himself.
    thank you, april

  20. Apologize for my phones self editing!

  21. April, I am very sad to hear about your experiences and I read through both your blog posts. It pains me to hear about the hurt and exploitation from the porn industry and then to deal with disappointment and deep disillusionment again when working with the pink cross to help women trying to leave.

    I would like to apologize indirectly for having spent thousands of dollars on porn which has hurt your life in the past. I am 3 years and 4 months sober now, and have made it a top priority in my life to do everything I can to stop any further hurt. I've also donated over a thousand to pink cross, with the intention of helping the website, helping women leave porn, etc.

    I hope in my heart that you can continue in your desire to help women in whatever way God desires, and I am really sad to hear how you wanted to help and sacrificed so much, but it didn't work out.

  22. I am just hurt and confused right now! Part of me understands attack spiritually when you are in obedience to the will of God in your life, I also know that we give the DEVIL to much credit and 60% of the issue we deal with are more about our choices and consequences and it is easier to blame the enemy than to come clean and allow God to change us. I saw a video a while ago about a woman I think her name was Michelle I can't remember who made claims that Shelley uses prescription drugs with the PC girls and on her own and that she is a avid drinker., I honestly wrote it off as though this girl had a issue with Shelley or someone in PC and decided to make a video to bash them. I also know that sometimes when you give people the truth they dont always receive it with grace. I then read the You Tube video about the letter written by her brother, first I did not even know she had one and there are members of my family that will never admit the abuse I suffered at thier hands and will do what ever they can to discredit me so I prayed for Chris Moore and Michelle and PC and left it in God's hands. I try so hard not to listen to or participate in gossip or slander especially when it comes to my family in Christ and Leaders in Christ. However, after reading your blog posts April something in my spirit tends to believe alot of what you have written. You have no idea how hard it is to admit that only because PC website is what God led me too when he first confirmed to me that he wanted me to go back to "Egypt" sort of speak and share my testimony and the word of God with my those still trapped. Her testimony moved me and really confirmed alot of things to me ,LET ME STATE FOR THE RECORD!! God led me to that for a confirmation and God can use anything and anyone he wants to in order to do that so I never glamorized Shelley but glorified what God has done in her life. If God can use a donkey and a burning bush.. you feel what I am saying. So that being said I still concede that I am going to pray that God will heal you of any hurt you are feeling. April I suffered horrible spiritual abuse from the church that I was born again in and it was VEYR cult like as a matter of fact I left the Mormon church shortly before I got saved and believe me there was not much difference in thier conduct. It took me years after leaving there and falling away from Jesus to realize that I was following the Church and really did not understand how to follow Jesus because I was so manipulated by them to follow the Jesus they told me to follow, Praise God for his grace and that is truly not the case now. I just want to encourage you to draw very very very close to God and allow him and only him to lead and guide and order your steps. He will lead you to where he wants you to fellowship and pray and ask God to choose your friends for you and I am believing in God for you and your daughter to be reunited, God Bless you April and I am praying not only for you but for PC as a ministry that God will have his way in all of this and he would bring revelation and correction and healing. Never met you but I love you! God Bless my beautiful Sister!

  23. I use to be addicted to porn do to the hurting in my own life. After reading so many of these peoples testimonies I realized that my desires were completely selfish and destroying the lives of others. If I was going to continue calling myself a christian, then I had to stop. By watching these things I was turning a blind eye to the suffering of the 'actresses'. I knew lust was wrong but porn gave me a false sense of not being alone. I know everyone says you're never alone with God. Generally those same people that say those things, have friends and family. I learned from the former porn stars that I was contributing to someone else's injustice because of my own injustices.

    For that I do not regret giving money to the Pink Cross. Only because that is where I first learned and heard the testimonies.

    I always wondered why Shelly seemed to come across as so arrogant. I know of other anti-porn ministries like JC girls, Hookers for Jesus. Those ladies that run them seem genuine and love to talk about Jesus. Shelly seemed to love to talk about everything else but Jesus. Adding in a lot of her 'power and authority'

    The only thing is that I never heard the horror stories from the other ministies that I did from the Pink Cross. I never knew what it was like for the ladies on the other side of my computer screen.

    So with all that said. I tell you this. God used Judas when Judas thought he was using God. So shall it be with the others. What they do, is with evil motives. Their selfish motives fell right into God's plan. Shelly might have her own motives, but a lot of stories have been heard. Perhaps people will learn it's okay to come out of the dark and talk about how dark it really was. They don't need Shelly to do that. They just need courage.

    I do hope that you're life recovers quickly from this. I pray that your finances recover as well and you can live in peace the rest of your days.

  24. This comment has been removed by the author.

    1. Well April let me just share this :

      I have said my piece in the past,on this matter.

      And just to let everyone know that I served with April in this group. I have spent time in fellowship with April after we left this group, & talked about ministry in what she is praying about doing next. And to tell you all, April is strong in the Lord, & in her walk. She went through alot in being involved with this group & And April is doing fine.

      Now with our friend Michelle that someone mentioned,in a comment above. April & I support her & for her to get the proper help & support she needs. What Michelle & her daughter went through with this group under their care, Nobody should go through anything like that.

      If someone has harmed you, you need to tell somebody.

      And I got the call from Michelle before her video came out, And it broke my heart from what I had to hear from Michelle, I didn't want to believe it at 1st, but what Michelle shared is the truth.

      I went out of my way to get her help with the proper contacts she needed to be placed with the proper care she needed. So she got the proper help. It was Michelle who, felt compelled to share what she did on video a month after.

      I encourage for those who read this : To look at the groups who do the same type of ministry like this one, to check them out before supporting or backing a group financially & find out were the money is going too. What their mission statment says, if they have accountability, if they have a Covering/ Backing a church. And also if they proclaim the Gospel of Jesus Christ. And if Christ is lifted up, & is #1

      If Jesus is not #1 & the talk is about "I have the Truth about this or that,and its the "I" infection talk. Question if its about the leader or about Christ?

      And lastly :

      If you see a leader claiming to be a prophet like Elijaih & says they have a prophetic gift, or have an 8 foot staff like Moses, & doing this that are questionable, that doesnt look like what a minister/leader should be doing & uses the term Do Not Touch God's Anointed. Then their is a problem...I ask to you to check out

      But all in all God knows the Score & He is still on the throne & letting this situation ride its course...

      And I want to say that their are groups who are Backed by the church, have the Accountability, & are not an anti-group.

  25. It did not take long for me to see through Shelley Lubben and what a fake "Christian" she is. I started a ministry in August 2011 in Toronto Canada to reach out to women in the sex industry and hope to have a place one day to take women in should they need a place to stay and get back on their feet. We do not ask the public for donations as all the money that goes into this ministry is my money, whenever I have it, or is from members of my Church. What she is doing is making the work of true born-again believers allot harder! She wasted so many opportunities to give the gospel and really help people...Shelley Lubben needs to be born-again herself, I cannot believe that she is saved! I hope that I can reach Ron Jeremy myself ,and all of these women and men, in this satanic industry to give them the gospel ! Jesus Christ is coming soon!

    Thank you for standing up and speaking out against this false Christian!

  26. It's funny, I had a sneaky suspicion that PC was a cult. I'm a survivor of sex trafficking and child pornography and I tried to talk to Shelley about it. She didn't reply at all so I decided to try something. I went to her facebook page and said I would donate $100 to PC. Then she came out of the shadows and praised me for donating! Nonetheless, I never sent the money.

  27. april this is your calling to start a true ministry

  28. I keep on having this feeling that Shelly is a good person who just happens to be deceived or misled, or not mature enough yet for mission.

    I think perhaps her childhood demons still surround her a bit, and she is so eager to do something for GOd having come out of porn, that she just hops into the ministry without enough support or preparation. This happens to people. I agree molested individuals often grow up to be more self-centered (not necessarily selfish), often too busy to look out for other's need because of their own insecurities and anxiety. But base on her brother's letter to her. Her instinct to save him during the car collision shows that deep inside she is loving.

    I don't really agree with the bashing coming from everyone, because you're not being Christians either. I feel like the writer talks in close scrutiny about Shelley as if she should be perfect. I really don't think anyone can ever be. I say this because I serve at church with very little support as well, and I do experience a lot of attacks from the enemy. I know for certain I have a heart only to serve God and want no attention for myself. But because of my innate charisma, people tend to always assume I was "glad" to be getting attention or trying to control things. This is very judgemental and immature. Do you know what they did with the prophets? Jesus talked about how the israelites always ended up killing the prophets and not listening to them. People would always find faults with prophets. But I must admit, I hardly think Shelly is a prophet by any OT standard. However, the Holy Spirit gives gifts to Christians and some people have gifts for discernment and prophesy. This paul has mentioned in the new testament.

  29. The point I am saying is that no one is perfect and yes a delivered person can sometimes have scars from the past or even unright behaviors. What WE NEED TO DO IS NOT TO JUDGE THEM. Because everyone who believes in Christ is forgiven and not judged. Who are we to judge others. We should gently bring them back with the WORD OF GOD. Based on your post, you have NOT ONCE approach your sister who you feel have wronged you. When she was wrong, you should rebuke her with the WORD, not act like a victim of a monster and then vent to others after you leave. That is not Christian like either. I have a general feeling that you live life as a victim. Which I can relate to sometimes, but it isn't right in the Lord.

    I think it's dangerous to call people false prophets or abusers of power because they fall sometimes. It's more important to help them see where they might need help and get them help. It sounds like Shelley is in more need of doctrinal truth and a good paster's help and more prayers. I think it's WRONG to presume she has bad intentions to abuse for money. I think people can always think wrong. Lift these people up to God. I agree she may be spiritually confused, isn't it part of growing in Christ. Even prophets need to grow and what they need the most are Christian brothers and sisters around them to help them.

    I really disagree with the post's inclination to define a person and proclaim some organization a cult too easily. Anyone here try to lead a ministry and you will see you will quickly become a cult, because all your flaws can be judged by the law of God according to people. It's because we still have the flesh even if we become Christians. We need to daily nail the flesh to become more honed in to the Spirit. But it's a process. I agree Shelley might be going a little off, but guys, that's why we need to HELP and SUPPORT, NOT DISTANCT AND GOSSIP. This is the problem of humanity. No one ever gets the message of Christ, does anyone? You can forgive a crack addict porn star, but we cannot bring back a sister from her spiritual confusion. SURELY WE CAN, through the love of Christ!
    We have so many divisions. Jesus doesn't want that.

    You need to forgive her for the things you don't agree with, but also watch yourself from being too needy or self-righteous. Leaders are people.
    As long as they still believe in Jesus, we can bring them back by gentleness and patience with prayer.

    I believe Pink Cross has good intentions. It can probably go very wrong or can mature by learning its failings. It all depends. Let's pray for them.

  30. I thought that the expose on the tax returns was a nice touch until I did a little research myself. Truthfully, I thought that was the worst analysis of a tax return I have seen in my career as an accountant.

    What I found was that the IRS had some 990 processing errors for the years 2007-2009. The Foundation Center posted this on their website (the Foundation Center is an organization much like Guidestar):

    "The Foundation Center has been notified of an IRS processing error affecting electronically filed Forms 990 for filing years 2007, 2008, and 2009. (Note that Forms 990-PF and 990-EZ are not affected.) These processing errors have resulted in inaccurate data appearing on the scanned images of these tax returns, and may not accurately reflect the information filed with the IRS".

    April, I think it is your fruit that is rotten. Maybe you should check your facts first or have your stooges do a better job checking facts for you. For the most part, I think this whole blog is a bunch of chick drama.

  31. Dear April,
    I just wanted to say that I disagree with you SO much on all of this. Shelley is a jewel. God's jewel. She has helped me SO much and I never once felt intimidated by her or thought she was trying to control me. She asked me to share my story and no, she did not embellish it or make it sadder or anything else. She is 100% real and called by God. Maybe it's jealousy on your part? I know many women and MEN whom Shelley has helped and who she works with and they all think quite differently than you. I myself have praised Shelley over and over, and she would correct me every time and tell me that its all because of our God. He does work through people, and He works through her. Stop hating on Shelley and the Pink Cross.

  32. Hi, Morgan;

    If Shelley has helped you, then that is good and I am very happy for you. That being said, I personally know women whom Shelley has not helped and, on the contrary, has actually hurt. Several have come forward publicly. Others have not come forward, but have come to me privately expressing their grievances....more than just a handful, I might add.

    Your experience was obviously very different from mine, and that of many other girls. Shelley did not typically correct people for praising her, as you have suggested; on the contrary, she would elevate herself and tell me, and others on the Pink Cross team, that God gifted her and gave her a ministry that superceded other ministries. She told me that she knew more Bible than anyone, and that she was greater than the apostle Paul. I would like to say that Shelley perhaps has toned down the self-adulation since I worked with her, but even today, if you look on her facebook page, you will see people praising her and declaring her greatness, and she does nothing to correct this; on the other hand, she is certainly quick to delete comments that question or criticize her.

    Again, I am glad that she helped you, but may I suggest that the help you received from Shelley was God helping you, not because of her, but in spite of her. I have worked very closely with her for many years, and knew her better than most of the women she has "helped." Everything I say in my blog is truthful and from the heart. I believe that God intervenes in the lives of all of His children, that His will may be carried out, and I believe He intervened in mine to bring me out of that horrible situation.

    I do not believe that the Pink Cross Foundation is of God, nor do I believe that Shelley is led by the Holy Spirit.

  33. Well, I've heard a VERY different story than the one you told in your blogs about the situation because I was concerned and I asked someone who works with Pink Cross, and it wasn't Shelley. You can think anyway you want about Shelley but why would you want to say all these negative things? Because you were burned and it didn't work out for you? It makes me very angry to see someone being so mean about her. I've talked to several people who also work with Shelley and they've all taken me in and been SO good to me. I'm sorry it didn't work out for you, but don't be negative towards Shelley. She still loves you and prays for you daily. Because she is a wonderful person and God is using her. She doesn't even see half of the crap on her facebook that comes in- I had to inform her of some of the negativity so she could delete it. You know why? Because it doesn't need to be there. That is her facebook page. I'm sorry but if people started posting crap on your facebook wall would you not want to remove it? I know I wouldn't want my two daughters subjected to LIES about their mother. I'm sorry. She's just reached out to me and been a help like no one else and I will continue to defend her and her ministry anytime negativity comes my way about it. She helped you SO much. How much did she REALLY help you financially?? How long did she listen to your story and who else from the Pink Cross listened to you? Being honest with yourself, I bet more than your admitting.

  34. Morgan -- Any positive experience you may have had with her does not negate the bad experience that I, and SEVERAL other women, have had with her. To say otherwise is to call me a liar.

    I am not surprised that Shelley's servants are praising her. They did the same thing when I was with the organization. The times when I would express my concern about Shelley, I would be told that Shelley was "busy" or that I didnt understand the "high calling" or the spiritual warfare that she was subjected to.

    I will not even address your suggestions that I am lying and Shelley REALLY helped me. You were not there, Morgan. You did not see the interaction between Shelley and I. There are things that I am still trying to recover from, and no, Morgan, she did NOT help me financially, as you suggest.

    As I said, whatever positive experience you may have had with her does not negate mine, nor those of other women, who came to Shelley for help and were used.

    I pray that you do not fall into the mindset that so many other people seem to fall into....that being if someone shows kindness to you, that it doesnt matter how many other people that he/she hurts.

    Morgan, what you choose to believe is your decision. You can choose to continue believing Shelley's side of the story, and that I, and the other girls, are bitter, jealous, etc., or you can choose to believe the stories that not only I, but other women, and even Shelley's own brother, have laid out.

    The choice is yours, but do not keep coming on here and telling me that I am a liar and am jealous. You have not known Shelley like I have, and you were not there when all of this went down. Shelley has a very dark side, and I thank God that you have not seen it.

  35. WHATEVER! Prayers for you, April :)

  36. April,

    Thank you so much for your faithfulness to the Spirit to share God's truth in the light of what's happened here with you and the Pink Cross. Deception through false teaching is one of the evil one's most shrewd convert tactics. I came across the Pink Cross through a book called "Porn Free." It listed the Pink Cross as a resource while providing a biblical perceptive on dealing with porn addiction through Truth and Community in a Christian Fellowship. As I read your story, among others(Shelley's brother etc.), tears and sadness swelled in my heart to see how the Gospel was being perverted by the Pink Cross.

    While reading, the Spirit also put this Matthew 16:25 verse on my heart where Jesus said: "For whoever wishes to save his life will lose it; but whoever loses his life for My sake will find it." Jesus spoke of only two different ways of life and two different outcomes: self-serving lifestyle v.s. self-giving lifestyle. “For My thoughts are not your thoughts, Nor are your ways My ways,” declares the Lord." ~Isaiah 55:8 Ultimately, only God, through Jesus and the Holy Spirit can convict our hearts on this issue.

    I pray that the Truth will come out and that God's goodness and power will shine through the cloud of confusion. I pray that the Gospel, Jesus' sacrifice on the cross will pierce our hearts to bring out areas in our lives where we are saying "No" to God. For Christ is the source of our healing, not the Pink Cross or anybody on this earth for that matter. Our Creator deserves and is worthy of all our mind, heart and soul!

    Blessings and prayers.

    P.S. This is a really awesome music video on forgiveness, it really spoke to me and I hope it does the same to you!

  37. Reading some of the comments, I think it's interesting that some folks can't seem to grasp the following concepts:

    1) People who are abusive usually have two faces. They're not always mean to everyone, and in fact can be extremely charming.

    2) To really get to know someone, it often takes many years.

    Concerning point #2, I had a "best" friend in college for a long time. We stayed friends for about 4 1/2 years. But toward the end of our friendship, she changed. She had been a Muslim until the last year, and then came to Christ. But after coming to Christ, she became mean in many ways. Why? I think because Satan never persecuted her before, but now as a Christian she was experiencing great opposition even from her own family. And she became bitter. Anyway, she just abruptly ended our friendship by giving me the silent treatment, which was a total shocker. After leaving her several phone messages, which she never returned, I eventually just let her be. And I never heard from her again. I would've never thought she was capable of that, but obviously she was. It took me 4 1/2 years to see that side of her.

    Anyway, just because Shelley may have a sweet side, that really doesn't mean anything at all, and it definitely doesn't negate the abuse that many say they experienced from her.

  38. I am glad to see Gospel-centered critiques from Gospel-believing people here. I previously thought that all of the Pink Cross criticisms were just slanderous attacks from the horrible porn industry.

    This blog and SO many of the comments are definitely done in the spirit of truth and love--not attacks and lies.
    (Biblical critique/accountability.)

    I'm gonna keep donating to Morality in Media's "Porn Harms" and add one of those other anti-porn ministries after halting my PC donations.

    I, too, am super glad and grateful for learning about the harms to the performers initially from Shelley's testimonies and web pages.

    Please pray for me that I will truly repent and have faith in God, if I haven't really done so already.
    [I'm glad to know the Gospel and am happy to display it for others to hear and completely understand: youtube/News2urEars).]

    1. Thanks, Rob,

      for the alternative option (PornHarms) you brought up.

      But I have to say that since I'm from West Europe I havn't heard anything about any of the Participating Groups but FocusOnTheFamilys CITIZENlink and PinkCross (which has a great logo that stands out).

  39. Shelley might not be perfect but she tells the truth about Porn! Shure all lot of people (and the devil) wants her to shut up.

    You should say the same thing about Shelley that Jesus said about the Pharisees: Take the truth they are telling to heart "but do not do what they do, for they do not practice what they preach." (Matthew 23)

    Im from Western Europe and God used Shelleys unperfect effort to tell me the truth about porn. Im shure God can use her for the good cause. Please pray for her and her mission.

    What you say about her newest video?

  40. Everything I've seen Shelley do and say doesn't lead me to believe she is what you guys say she is. It seems to be that the porn industry has created blog posts to attack people who try to tell the truth about them. I have no doubt that the person who created this blog post, the person who coincidentally won't post their name, is really someone hired by a porn company to slander Shelley.

  41. Yeah, I saw her shocking rape video too, and I am horrified of what the porn industry is. I don't like her extreme Christian preaches, but I am very happy to have her expose those horrors of pornography. I understand where she comes from in wanting to protect young women involved in adult entertainment, as well as men. God, you start to feel like an animal when you enter a promiscuous lifestyle.

  42. I have recently started a website called which is just another pebble in the pond in seeking to help those whose lives and marriages are been destroyed by pornography. I came across the Pink Cross site and thought it would be lovely to link to some of the testimonies there. Then I came across this blog (by April, I think) and it made me cautious. I have experienced in the past the problems that can arise when leaders of a movement begin to act in an authoritarian way so I am grateful for this blog. Perhaps we can take encouragement though from the apostle Paul who was able to rejoice that Christ was being preached even by those whose motives were suspect. Sincerely, Chris Nel. Yorkshire, England.

    1. Hi, Chris. Thank you for reading my blog. I am very glad that it was helpful to you. I visited your website, and think it looks fantastic. I especially like the "Common Questions About Pornography" section. You covered a lot of ground. If you are still looking for stories that you can put on your website, I may be able to help you with some. Just let me know. Again, thank you so much, and God bless you. I do praise God for the people who are being freed from the bondage of pornography through the Pink Cross site, but then again, I attribute that completely to Jesus Christ, and very little to Shelley. If God can speak through Balaam's donkey, He can surely use any of us :)

  43. I think all people who are truly revolutionary draw incredibly powerful reactions: both for and against. I have been working with Shelley for about a year now, and I find her to be giving, candid, and honest, almost to a fault; she reveals everything. That openness often leaves her susceptible to attack. But it is this vulnerability that has endeared her to so many and helped her to reach into the lives of the lonely and the confused. I do not know why some have needlessly bashed her. Its self-serving and does nothing for the cause. I have been a Christian moral activist for almost a decade, and have met some people who were in this for all the wrong reasons (Shelley is certainly not one of those;) I just walked away from them and made it a point to never work with them again; I pray they find their way; but I do not publicly judge. That's for the Lord.
    Here is a link:

    1. Joseph --- I am glad to hear that your experience with Shelley was a positive one, but in no way does that discount the negative experiences of myself and other women who have been involved with her. I pray that your relationship with the Lord continues to grow deeper and deeper. Praise Him for His grace upon all of us!!

  44. Here's something to think about:

    Let's suppose that Shelley Lubben is completely innocent of all the charges against her. If so, then why hasn't she come over here to defend herself? She could say something like:

    "April, dear sister, you know that I treated you well. Why would you be saying all these awful things about me? It really hurts me to the core. You know I love you, but I hate these lies. Please tell the truth. I am praying that God will help you do the right thing."

    Nope, haven't heard a peep out of Shelley over here. That alone speaks volumes IMO. ;) I think an innocent person would be doing all they could to clear their name.

    While I'm glad to hear that some folks have been having positive experiences with Shelley lately, that does absolutely nothing to change what she did to many others.

    1. Thanks for your response. I dont know how Shelley is conducting herself these days, as I am no longer part of the Pink Cross Foundation. She could very well have cleaned up her act.

      Like you said, just because a few people have had some good experiences with her, does not negate the bad experiences that others have had.

      She can come out and defend herself and tell me how much she loved me and sacrificed for me all she wants, but actions speak louder than words. I've head a lot of people in my life say that they love me, only to abandon or backstab me. Talk is cheap, as you very well know.

  45. You're welcome, April. Oh, yeah, if Shelley came over here with a sob story, I wouldn't buy it for a minute. :) But the fact that she isn't even trying to dispute your story says a lot IMO.

  46. So let me get this right. Shelley has been using donation money illegally or or inyou unapproved ways. And she posted a video of one of the ladies(respectful term) getting raped by some porn "producer" and his hired thugs? And what person deemed that idea to be a good one!? It's demeaning enough that videos the lady was forced to be in are most likely on many porn sites. But, to actually post and to show one is a bit far. Awareness that porn is disgusting and demeaning exists. It's pretty obvious when you go looking for links on sore throats and hoping to get remedies and instead you get max hardcore links.

  47. Seems that Pink Cross is STILL doing great things to this moment despite the hatred going on on this side of things. If you really cared less about Shells then u wouldn't spend so much time inquiring about what shes up to at adult con, huh? Seems like you can't get into the drama ENOUGH. And this my friends is why Shelley doesn't waste her precious time wit this ridiculousness :)

  48. I have been trying my best to help a loved one out of pornography and prostitution for years, and that is what brought me to Pink Cross and eventually Treasures. I donated money to PC and considered volunteering, just about this time several investigative pieces (written by a friend) were published on PC and Luben. I got the skinny on her from an unbiased source off the record. I myself began to criticize Luben's use of the words porn and porn star in her posts etc. As this is glamorizing and lending acceptability to the sex industry try it pornography performer v Porn Star, porn v pornography . I stopped supporting PC and began giving to Treasures which is a much more legitimate and professional agency.My story here if you care to read.

  49. I will take into account what you said as I know some female bodybuilders who are somewhat involved in this industry doing sessions and fetish films. Also having node photos on their web pages. I might be writing for some publications and interacting with these women so if I do I will consider resigning my membership in the Pink Cross

  50. This whole episode of PC and the ongoings therein make very sad reading. I also watched the video and for the love of God, what was all that dancing about? I am saddened by PC's revelations here and can only reluctantly agree with the author of this blog and her position to expose and warn.

  51. April, I want to thank you for your input concerning the Pink Cross. It pains me that someone would exploit such an important cause. It pains me that someone would propose that they had been called as a prophet only to pimp people, but then again, I guess that's all to common these days. April, while Shelley may be no prophet, I am concerned because you seem to espouse cessationalism. I know you may know what cessationalism teaches, but for those who don't know this word, cessationalism refers to the doctrine that since 100 AD, God no longer speaks audibly or acts through Gifts of the Spirit.

    You claimed that God no longer appoints prophets because he has spoken to us by his Son in these last days. I want to bring to your attention that Paul wrote Hebrews 1:2 and while Paul wrote Hebrews 1:2 claiming that God now speaks through his Son, Paul also prophesied, spoke with tongues, etc. In fact, in genuine prophecy, the message is given to the believer directly from the Spirit of the Lord Jesus (1 Peter 1:10-12). In fact, the Spirit of Christ is the Spirit of prophecy, which is why those on whom the Spirit falls prophesy (Revelations 19:10, Acts 2:16-18). Therefore the teaching that prophecy ceased because God now speaks through his Son is not a biblical teaching.

    Even into the Tribulation, the scriptures refer to genuine miracles and gifts existing as seen with the two prophets in Revelations 11 and the believers in Daniel 11:32, yet it seems you've proclaimed the doctrine of cessationalism. Tertullian, Martyr, and Irenaeus all claimed that their assemblies exhibited the gifts of the Spirit, well after 100 AD. While I would pose that Irenaeus differed on doctrine from the other two and from large tenets of Western Christianity, all three are considered "Church Fathers" by Western Christianity AS A WHOLE. Cessationalist theologeans have taught for years that when the Apostles died, the Gifts ended. The testimony of the aforementioned three refutes such revisionist history common to the doctrine of cessationalism.

    Finally, the one passage in 1 Corinthians 13:10-12 that cessationalists use refers not to the publication of the bible and the ceasing of the Gifts, but rather to the second coming and the subsequent ceasing of the Gifts. The subject of the controversy, "that which is perfect" (the collected and bound bible VS. the second coming) is best defined by the text itself. Go to verse 12 which speaks of seeing through a glass darkly but then seeing "face to face." That obviously refers to the second coming where we will be like him and see him as he is (1 John 3:2).

    While Shelley may not be the Prophet to the Nations, prophecy and prophets have by no means passed away. Apostles, Prophets, Teachers, Evangelists, and Pastors will not pass away until there is unity in the faith, unity within the knowledge of the Son of God (the Word), unto the measure of the stature of the fulness of Christ (Ephesians 4:11). When the body of Christ reaches that measure, achieving full unity with the Word, let alone each other, then there will no longer be Apostles, Prophets, Teachers, Evangelists, and Pastors. Do we have unity now? Does the church currently measure up to the fullness of the stature of Christ? Of course not.

    Lastly, why I find this doctrine of cessationalism so odious, is not just the error, but the pride. From the Cessationalist interpretation of 1 Corinthians 13:11, we see that when I was a child I acted as a child (pre-100 AD), but when I became a man (100 AD and after), I put away childish things (Gifts of the Spirit). I ask you and all who hold this doctrine, do any of us really see ourselves as more mature than the Apostles? You can hold to your concordances, but when did God ever boast that he would send scholars and seminaries?

    I love you all and pray that all would not only overcome the lust of the flesh, but also the tradition of men.

  52. Hi, I kind of just wandered on this site. Seeing the evidence I am not disputing that Shelley Lubben isn't perfect. I don't know her personally and so I cannot say who is right or wrong. What I can say is was her testimony and the testimony of others at The Pink Cross Foundation and convinced my porn addicted husband and myself of the darkness and evils of porn. That is was not something that should be acceptable. It was her site that caught my eye first when I was looking for answers for us as our marriage was suffering. It was a great healing to pray for all of you who participate in this ministry and for the girls caught up in the sex industry. God used this ministry in a mighty way in my life and others.
    Furthermore, if Shelley have believes that are contrary to the word of God or if she practices bad ethics that compromise the ministry and it's people, God will deal with that and pray for that. Pray and pray and pray that she repent if that is the case and there is sin God will reveal it. The fact is that this ministry has helped countless people and has brought people to Christ. How about you? I don't see you in the news, talking to our leaders? If her ministry is so corrupt then where is your ministry or is this is. This post. Your dedicated to expose of ministry leaders? What are you trying to do by exposing these antics? that she is a sinner? Tim. 5:19-21
    Do not listen to an accusation against an elder unless it is confirmed by two or three witnesses. Those who sin should be reprimanded in front of the whole church; this will serve as a strong warning to others. I solemnly command you in the presence of God and Christ Jesus and the holy angels to obey these instructions without taking sides or showing favoritism to anyone. "
    Or this 2 Thessalonians 3:14-15: "Take note of those who refuse to obey what we say in this letter. Stay away from them so they will be ashamed. Don't think of them as enemies, but warn them as you would a brother or sister." or Mathew 18 bs 15 thru 17, 15 “If another believer[a] sins against you,[b] go privately and point out the offense. If the other person listens and confesses it, you have won that person back. 16 But if you are unsuccessful, take one or two others with you and go back again, so that everything you say may be confirmed by two or three witnesses. 17 If the person still refuses to listen, take your case to the church. Then if he or she won’t accept the church’s decision, treat that person as a pagan or a corrupt tax collector."
    Have you tried to initiate these things to bring out all of these things into the open? " Surely of there is sin in this ministry then this is what should be done according to God's word.
    Pray for Shelley that if she is in sin or confused about her authority or the word of Christ that thru the word she may be brought back right. PRAY FOR SHELLEY!!!!!!! AZBZOVE ALL SHE IS STILL A SISTER IN CHRIST!! SHE IS A SINNER SAVED BY GRACE AS YOU ARE ALSO!!!

  53. Hello;

    I wanted to take a few moments to respond to your post.

    First of all, people have confronted Shelley about her dealings, but she refuses to listen, because in her mind, she is above everyone else, and not subject to correction.

    I'm glad that God has delivered your family from the destruction of pornography, but please do not attribute this to Shelley. It was GOD who led you to her site, and did this work in your life. That being said, it has nothing to do with Shelley and EVERYTHING to do with Christ. God has used corrupt people to do His work in the lives of people, but this does not make a hero or a saint out of those people, and they will still be accountable to God for the evils and wrongs that they do. That does not mean that God cannot use them, because it is for HIS glory, not theirs...and this does not make them any less corrupt.

    You also point out that, because Shelley is in the public eye, that she should be elevated? I hope you understand that a person does not have to be in the public eye to be used powerfully of God; in fact, those who are truly filled with the spirit and practice humility, which we as Christians should be doing, do not bring attention to themselves, or their works. They do not go out of their way to be recognized.

    This is why so much false teachers and preachers are able to take advantage of people --- because we equate the praise of men, or fame, with being used of God, when in actuality, God's mightiest works are done OUTSIDE the spotlight.

    I do believe this is why there is so much corruption in the church and among church leaders -- because people refuse to call out those who are doing wrong, or they only worry about how they helped THEM. Even if Shelley's ministry has been beneficial to you, or even many others, that still does not excuse how she has hurt not just me, but several other women who truly came to her for help.

  54. When you find GOD
    You'll find TRUTH

  55. does she really help pornstars?i feel she only wants money!

  56. can people in the xxx business get saved?

  57. I just wanted to make a couple of comments:

    1) There is a Web site called, which allows you to rate non-profit organizations. There is a listing for Pink Cross there. So, I would encourage anyone who's had first-hand experience with Pink Cross to add a rating/review on that site.

    2) Anyone who has been involved in porn will have deep wounds on their soul. Although I've never been involved in porn, I have had deep wounds on my soul caused by other things. Anyway, there is a free teaching series on YouTube called "The Glory Light of Jesus" by Katie Souza, and it teaches you how to apply the Glory Light of Jesus to your soul in order to receive healing of your soul wounds. It's a very powerful teaching, and I highly recommend it. Just do a Web search or go to YouTube directly and type in "'Glory Light of Jesus' Katie Souza" and the teaching should easily pop up. I hope many other folks find this teaching as helpful as I have.

  58. creepy. why do you recognize the visitor place. but anyways, i was disgusted by it. perhaps, the past stain still is with her. but thanks though.

  59. I wonder if this is one of the reasons why Patrice Roldan went back to porn. I was saddened to find out today that Patrice turned to Christ few years ago and then came back to porn around last year. On wiki, she claims that the Pinkcross didn't cross paths with her agenda. Whatever is the reason, it feels as the Pinkcross really screwed some people over. The whole day I couldn't stop praying for Patrice because I felt the lord was telling me to do so. And now the Lord led me to this site. I'm only conjecturing about what all went down, but I pray for the Lord to fix this matter and have Patrice return as a lost sheep back to Jesus. I pray for Shelly to not harden her heart as well. It's all in the Lord's hands now.

  60. i believe you have some personal discrepancies with Shelly which i think you should probably resolve. before i continue i think i should mention that i am not a fan of Shelly or PC but i happened to have gone through the websites two or three times and i have read his article and some of the comments, my opinion on all this is that if you feel like shelly is a fake or a false prophet you should have prayed concerning it and let God reveal these things by himself to the world; when eli's children were stealing the sacrifices to be made to God, he did not send Samuel to proclaim in Israel that they were fraud and that people should stop giving them sacrifices but instead he proved himself God and punished them with his own hand in a way that all of israel kne that God was unhappy with them. what you have done by exposing all her flaws(whether they may be true or false) i cant see how it bring glory to the name of the lord but instead i see a lot of people being grateful to you for exposing her. the only thing that you proved to me is that no body is perfect; David was a man after God's heart and yet he committed adultery, Moses was beloved by God and yet he disobeyed, peter was a friend of Christ and yet he denied him. when Christ came he did not come to pick the perfect but he went for the thief, the harlot, the drunk the only person in the place to judge is God. as far as i am concerned when one is donating to a cause concerning the Lord or missionary work, you give, not treating it like an investment where you go back to ask for returns; you should give to God and let it go, knowing that you have done your own part in giving and if the prophet you give it to doesn't not use it to glorify God then it is between him/her and God. in the comment i see people complaining that they may have been cheated; did you give the money to shelly or to God? in giving it not really about the amount given, it is about God seeing a heart which is willing to sacrifice to please him, so it is in donating when you donate towards spreading the gospel, God is more concerned with the fact that you gave from your heart than for the cause. this article has discouraged a lot of people from donating not just to PC but will make them hesitant in giving to other worthy causes. in the end, what if you are wrong about her? what if she was truly called by God? what if God created that ministry even if it was to save just one person (whom you may have convinced that it is not genuine)?dear admin i am also not saying you are wrong or you are lying but if you are wrong about her calling or her ministry, how will rectify the damage you have done? please let's all leave the judging or condemning to God. i hope no body is offended this is just my opinion.

  61. Hi, my name is Odia van Loggerenberg and I was nearly a 'supporter victim' of this lady and her Foundation. I am gratefull to Miss. April for her blog. I also did a quick research on the internet on other blogs and what they had to say against her 'ministry'. Factual data supplied there. I do feel so saddened about the high mortality rate amongst adult film industry 'actors' and the mainstream media don't seem to care, not even about just one death. These people are also human beings and they also need to have the sun shine on them. Much love and blessings to you Miss. April. From a caring member of the public. Xoxo!

  62. This was interesting. A few weeks ago, LifeSiteNews (a pro-life Web site) published a glowing article about Shelley Lubben. Underneath the article, I posted a comment about how Lubben is considered by many to be a con artist, and also mentioned your two-part blog post here. Well, LifeSiteNews deleted my comment. So, I posted another comment, and said that God would not be pleased with their deleting honest, polite comments. Guess what—they deleted this one too. Then I posted a short comment with a link to this blog post on the author's (Jonathon van Maren's) Facebook page. He immediately deleted it.

    Eventually, I found the e-mail address to the editor of LifeSiteNews, Steve Jalsevac, and told him what was going on. He said that he *told* the writer to delete the comment! (But obviously the writer decided for himself to delete my comment on his FB page.) Then Jalsevac was cold, unapologetic, and even accusatory, implying that I had some "personal agenda" against Lubben.

    For a supposedly Christian Web site, I thought their un-Christlike behavior was appalling. I wonder if they're on Shelley's payroll??? LOL. Anyway, I would call that spiritual abuse. The whole thing had me scratching my head. All I can say is—don't ever try to post a comment at LIfeSiteNews.

  63. Recently, have been listening and reading up on Shelly because she just seemed like such a dynamic person that was reaching out and helping others. And I wanted to become a part of her mission. I Just read this and my viewpoint of her has needless to say changed. I firmly believe that their are horrors that occur in the porn industry. I have heard it from other ex pornstars who are not affiliated with Shelly in any way and I've seen it first hand on this documentary that BBC made on "Date My Pornstar." I want to know the TRUTH with no embellishments or made up stories.This is a cause I feel strongly about and I want to follow a good organization that is fighting this pervasive problem from a place of humility and not selfishness! Anyone know of any good ones? If so, please email me at Thanks!!!

  64. Recently, have been listening and reading up on Shelly because she just seemed like such a dynamic person that was reaching out and helping others. And I wanted to become a part of her mission. I Just read this and my viewpoint of her has needless to say changed. I firmly believe that their are horrors that occur in the porn industry. I have heard it from other ex pornstars who are not affiliated with Shelly in any way and I've seen it first hand on this documentary that BBC made on "Date My Pornstar." I want to know the TRUTH with no embellishments or made up stories.This is a cause I feel strongly about and I want to follow a good organization that is fighting this pervasive problem from a place of humility and not selfishness! Anyone know of any good ones? If so, please email me at Thanks!!!

  65. Can we put a little focus here on YOUR side of the street here. I say that because when Shelley opened the Pink Cross - our program, Sex Workers Anonymous, was already doing a lot of outreach within the porn community, as well as the strippers, and the prostitutes. However, when Shelley started doing her outreach - she did so by actively doing everything she could to bash our work and our organization which was NOT acting at all like this. This was not accomplished all by herself - but actively engaged in by her members and supporters who joined in the attacks upon us. At events where we used to be welcome to speak - Shelley, and her people, would lie to the organizers. They would tell them that I was back being a "pimp" again, and that they would be "supporting crime" by having us come to speak about our work. To insulate herself from anyone telling the truth - she would have security be ordered to block us from even ATTENDING these events. Anyone that was a known member of SWA - found themselves barred from any of these events as not only a speaker, but as even a member of the audience. Our members started being stalked, threatened and attacked. When we would block these people identifying as followers of Shelley - they would make up new profiles to come at us again. It got so bad we had to tell all of our members to not self identify as SWA members because it would just lead to a barrage of attacks. Not just Shelley mind you - but people who worked under her like yourself. When we would have people get disgusted with what was happening at Pink Cross and reach out to us for help - they would be further threatened and terrorized not by the pimps or the porn industry but by Shelley's FOLLOWERS. Not Shelley herself - but her FOLLOWERS. Certainly you've had to see this writing this blog about your time with her - yet I've failed to receive any acknowledgment of these attacks, defamations, bullying, and the undermining of our work which IS effective - let alone an apology. You were a part of the attacks upon us while a part of Pink Cross and now you're attacking her - yet I see no change in your heart. I see no exercising of Christian teachings in that we have not been approached by you with any attempt to address how our work was undermined, how we were attacked, nor any apology nor done anything to help us undo the damage that was done. I've seen you blame the porn industry and now blame Shelley. How about YOUR actions here? What are YOU doing to get right with God here about the damage you did? You're confessing that Shelley is helping some people - sure she's taking "credit" as you say - but you're telling me she has helped. Yet now after undermining our work now you're undermining hers. What are YOU doing now to help others get out of the porn industry? How about some self responsibility and accountability here for YOUR actions? Shelley employed guard dogs who appear to have finally up and bit her. That's your legacy you want to go to God having as your record? Because I don't care if Shelley was contributing maybe 1 percent of her income to help the porn industry - guess what? It's 1 percent. Now I see someone trying to undermine the one percent. Who are you working for now? I'm not seeing God's work being done here. Not when the Bible teaches us "let he among you without sin cast the first stone". So are we supposed to believe you? The Bible teaches me to judge a tree by it's fruit. I'm not seeing God's work being done here either.

  66. Jody Williams,

    Hi. You have made some interesting points, but ultimately your comments miss the mark.

    First off, you seems to be assuming that Ms. Garris engaged in certain kinds of behavior as a member of Pink Cross. However, that is only a guess on your part. She worked for PC years ago, and may not have done that kind of thing at all. I think it would have been more appropriate to ask her the question, "Did you do this kind of stuff when you worked at PC?" than to adopt the accusatory tone that you have.

    Also, whether Ms. Garris is working in an active role against the porn industry nowadays is really beside the point. Here are a couple of questions to ask:

    1) Is Ms. Garris currently claiming to be "rescuing" anyone from the porn industry?
    2) Is she actively soliciting money for such a purpose?

    AFAIK, the answers to both questions are "no."

    Ms. Garris's two blog posts can basically be summed up as follows: "Shelley Lubben is a fraud, so please don't give her any money." Her role is to warn others about a false prophet.
    Since Ms. Garris is not claiming any special role herself in working against porn these days, your criticism of her in this area is essentially irrelevant.

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  68. Well, thanks for sharing. Anyone can prophesy, though, if they have the Holy Spirit. God even spoke through a donkey in the Old Testament. Also, S. Lubben does have a lot of fruit from her ministry. Many people have left porn and she headed the condom campaign to bring awareness to the fact that porn performers do not wear condoms. That is substantial fruit- it helped shut down part of the porn industry.

  69. Well, thanks for sharing. Anyone can prophesy, though, if they have the Holy Spirit. God even spoke through a donkey in the Old Testament. Also, S. Lubben does have a lot of fruit from her ministry. Many people have left porn and she headed the condom campaign to bring awareness to the fact that porn performers do not wear condoms. That is substantial fruit- it helped shut down part of the porn industry.

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